- Satan: Let there be shipping that costs more than the actual product.
The way he makes me laugh. Humor is a number one thing to win my heart. If I’m not laughing I’m not in a good mood. When a guy can make fun of himself and go out of his way to make me laugh. That’s the best.
- Girl: Hey can you check for me?
- Friend: Yeah walk in front of me.
- *looks at butt*
- Friend: Nope, you're good.
Have you ever sat in class and listened to the conversations around you and realized that you are the smartest person in the room.
OH MY GOD
My boss just texted me asking to come into work at 4:30 in the morning and I threw my phone down and was like “you’re such a faggot I fucking hate you” and then I heard the Siri confirmation noise and I picked up my phone and